Your children’s mental health affects everything.

Mental health affects the way we think and how we feel. And it influences all of our actions. Taking care of our mental health is as important as nurturing a healthy body. As adults, and particularly as parents, we play a fundamental role in our children’s mental health.

We can promote mental health by what we say and do, and through the environments we create at home. We should also be able to spot any early signs of mental health issues and know what to do to, or where to go for help.

Relationships are essential to our children’s mental health

For kids to develop good mental health, it’s crucial for them to develop strong relationships with both family and friends. While there are lots of ways to do this, one important way is through having significant people who are consistently present in a child’s life.

Significant people will play an important role in our children’s mental health. They help our kids develop the necessary resilience that will help them get through life with all its challenges. These significant people can show a child how to go about solving any of the problems that are sure to arise. They can also help children develop their self-esteem, so they feel good about themselves.

How to help:

To do this requires showing a lot of love and acceptance. It is encouraged by praising them when they do well and recognizing their effort as well as their achievement. Significant others should ask lots of questions about the kid’s activities and interests and help them set goals that are realistic. By listening and respecting a child’s feelings, they can show him or her that it’s OK to feel angry or sad. And they should encourage children to talk about how they are feeling.

Keeping the conversation fluid, asking and listening is very healthy. If we can’t be there all the time or there are things to discuss which are private, we should endeavor to help our children find other people to talk to when they don’t feel comfortable.

Your children’s mental health environment

A child’s media use, both regarding the content and the proportion of time spent accessing media, are important. As an adult, we should monitor the range, which includes movies, TV, the internet, games and gaming devices, as much as possible.

We need to be aware who they might be meeting and interacting with, in chatrooms and when playing online games. We need to know what they are watching, and how they are feeling about what they are watching. And we need to talk to our kids about making healthy choices regarding how much and what kind of media they consume.

We are role models for our kids.  

Children shouldn’t have to carry adult problems. So when you need to discuss important family issues around our children—like finances, marital tensions, or illnesses— be careful and sensitive! Children are prone to worry about anything untoward in these areas. But don’t hide it either. They need to hear how adults respond to tension, so they can learn how to deal with issues themselves.

It is hugely important that we make ourselves role models by taking care of our own mental health. We need to be seen and heard talking about our feelings and making time for things we enjoy. So where possible, make time for hobbies, exercise and family activities.

When situations are difficult, we should help our children solve their problems. One way is to teach our children how to relax, especially when they are upset. We can do this by emphasizing the power of deep breathing and doing things that are calming, like walking and other quiet activities they enjoy alone. Encouraging them to talk about potential solutions is always a good idea, but be careful not to be too pushy and don’t try to take over.

Detecting our children’s mental health problems

The estimates are that 20% of the world’s youth population has some form of mental health condition. The examples include anxiety, substance abuse, depression, eating disorders, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and learning disabilities. There are even more children who have milder emotional and behavioral problems.

It is unfortunate, but a lot of children don’t get the help they need soon enough. Mental health issues can have a significant detrimental effect, such as preventing children from succeeding at school, stopping them from making friends or learning to be independent. Put simply, our children’s mental health problems may be hold them back from reaching the developmental milestones they should be achieving.

However, mental health issues are invariably treatable. There are a variety of approaches we can employ to help our children if they are struggling with mental health or emotional problems. Getting help as early as possible is important. It can stop problems from escalating and can have a positive effect on our children’s development.

What are the signs?

Every child is unique. When we become concerned our child may have a problem, we need to look at any changes we perceive in how he or she is feeling, acting or thinking. As mental health problems can lead to physical changes, we need to watch out for these too. Be constantly aware of how a child is doing at school, at home and with friends.

To monitor our child’s thinking, note whether he or she is saying negative things, or blaming him or herself for things beyond their control. Do they have trouble concentrating? Is their school performance affected in any way?.

If our children are demonstrating feelings or reactions that seem out of proportion to the situation it’s a strong indication that something is wrong with their mental health. The same applies is they appear very unhappy, concerned, worried, guilty, irritable, fearful, sad, or angry as well as lonely, helpless, hopeless, or rejected.

Other warning signs include:

• Behaviour changes
• Desiring to be alone too often
• Crying a lot
• Withdrawing from games, sports or other activities
• Over-reacting to relatively small incidents.
• Appearing quieter than normal
• Being less energetic.
• Having trouble sleeping or relaxing
• Daydreaming excessively
• Acting without maturity
• Not getting along with friends.

Support for children’s mental health

There are numerous ways that we can help our children’s mental health. If we are truly concerned sharing them with the doctor is a good resort. Calling the doctor applies if any of the untoward behaviors last for a period or interfere with a child’s ability to function.

It is fundamental if a child ever talks about harming him or herself, or suicide, that we call the doctor or local mental health crisis line as soon as possible. But remember, just because we notice changes in our children it does not necessarily mean the child has a mental health problem.

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