We are not perfect and we are all making at least some of these parenting mistakes. Don’t worry we’ll show you how to replace them with constructive actions.
Parents are not flawless.
Luckily, we can always improve our parenting skills. Want to start with it immediately? Here are some basic guidelines for you to orientate!
1. Shouting at your kids
You don’t want to traumatize your kids by yelling. Firstly, it can cause long-term fear and anxiety in them. Secondly, it’s inefficient. Your children lose their focus the second you start shouting.
What can you do instead?
Count to 10 and tell them everything you would otherwise shout. Simply talk to them.
2. Treating your kids like they are perfect
They are perfect as your children, of course. Yet, ignoring some of their mistakes can cost them a lot in the future.
What can you do instead?
Set the limits and make them clear. If your children cross those limits, take actions.
3. Having high expectations
Every parent wants their children to be successful – and that’s exactly what puts a lot of pressure on many kids. Some children simply develop at their own pace and their interest may differ from the expectations of their parents.
What can you do instead?
Allow your kids to go in different directions. If they don’t seem to be making any progress with their baseball practices, maybe they will rock the guitar lessons.
4. Being judgemental
Negative comments on your kids’ behavior, looks, dreams or anything else can harm their self-confidence. Yet, numerous parents do it all the time, thinking those marginal comments are benign.
What can you do instead?
Accept the kids for who they are instead of expecting them to be flawless. Compliment them for the things that are good about them – we bet you have tons of materials.
5. Pushing things under the carpet
This particularly refers to parents of teenagers. At some point, hiding unpleasant things from your children simply doesn’t make sense. In the longer run, such practice might cause your kid become afraid of facing serious problems.
What can you do instead?
Be honest. It’s much better than allowing your children to catch you hiding things or lying to them.
6. Discouraging your kids from expressing their feelings
Many parents are sensitive to children’s tears and get angry when their children cry. That’s emotionally unhealthy and can cause traumas. Over the time, your children can become too shy or – much worse – ignore their own feelings.
What can you do instead?
Encourage your children to express any emotion they feel, be it happiness or anger. Instead of “how are you”, ask them “how do you feel” every once in a while. Let them know it’s natural to feel sad as much as it’s natural to feel happy.
Read more: 22 Ways To Be a Great Parent, Today
7. Controlling them too much
Some parents cannot separate being interested in their children’s lives and trying to control their lives. It usually causes rebellious responses in children, especially in their pre-teen and teen years.
What can you do instead?
Build a relationship based on a mutual trust. That way you won’t feel the need to check up on your child all the time.
8. Allowing them too much screen time
Although it’s the 21st century and we are all hooked on the technology, too much time in front of a screen, be it a tablet, computer or TV, is still bad for all of us – especially for our kids. Besides causing problems with sight, it can also cause a social detachment.
What can you do instead?
Establish a routine that involves more time spent outdoors, more reading and more socializing in person. Help them foster such habits since their earliest years.
9. Trying to be buddies with your children
There is a huge difference between having an open relationship with your little ones and trying to be their friend. They need you as a parent – trying to hand out with them and talk to them in slang terms might even embarrass them.
What can you do instead?
Keep a healthy distance between you and your kids. They should know they can rely on you and tell you their secrets but they should also know that you’re a responsible adult in charge of them.
Parenting mistakes happen.
If you stay aware of the potential dangers, you will minimize the chances of these mistakes happening to you. And don’t worry – it happens to virtually every parent. The only mistake we should really fear is not acknowledging our parenting mistakes and not trying to fix them.
What parenting mistakes have you made? And if you have a way to avoid them, we’d love to hear your suggestions.
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